We frequently examine as we speak’s childhood experiences to our personal growing up in the 80s and 90s — and the variations are stark. Whereas we regularly roamed freely (and with out watches, telephones, or Air Tags) till the road lights got here on, our children are far more scheduled and supervised.
Now, a new survey by The Harris Poll exhibits simply how sheltered and dependent many kids are as we speak — and the numbers are so surprising that it has many dad and mom questioning what the world will seem like when this era grows up and leaves the nest.
Among the key findings from the ballot about 8 to 12-year-olds embrace:
- Over one in 4 children isn’t allowed to play alone, even in their very own entrance yard.
- 71% of youngsters have by no means used a pointy knife.
- 45% of youngsters have by no means walked alone down the aisle of a retailer when their mother or father was in a special aisle.
- 56% of youngsters have by no means talked to a neighbor whereas alone.
- 62% have by no means walked or biked anyplace with out an grownup.
- 63% have by no means constructed a construction, like a fort or tree home, outdoors their house.
- 67% have by no means completed work that they’ve been paid for (like shoveling snow or babysitting).
- 61% have by no means made plans with a good friend and not using a mother or father serving to.
And these numbers aren’t as a result of children are afraid of the world.
The ballot additionally discovered that 61% of youngsters need to play in particular person with their associates and with out adults, whereas 87% mentioned they wished they might spend extra time taking part in with their associates in particular person and outdoors of college.
The ballot surveyed 522 children aged 8 to 12 throughout the USA in March 2025.
There’s been in depth analysis exhibiting that youngsters have to be taught independence, and an absence of independence in children has been linked to increased mental health issues and different long-term points.
On the identical time, one other research discovered that parents think they give their kids more independence than they actually do.
However, letting your children be taught to be on their very own — and even participate in dangerous conditions like utilizing a pointy knife — can have lots of optimistic outcomes.
“Basically,” Barry A. Garst, Ph.D., Affiliate Professor of Youth Improvement Management at Clemson College, informed Scary Mommy, “dangerous play supplies better alternatives for kids to check and affirm their capabilities, in addition to alternatives to expertise, deal with, and problem-solve conditions involving failure.”
This want for “dangerous play” may be particularly essential for youngsters, who naturally search out extra independence as they mature, he goes on. “[Risky play] actions can present youngsters with alternatives to satisfy their developmental wants for risk-taking in methods which might be safer than different types of risk-taking, corresponding to experimenting with dangerous behaviors.”
In different phrases, letting your teenagers go to the honest or mall alone or use energy instruments to create a construction may effectively be a greater possibility than them experimenting with unlawful substances or dashing in a automobile.
The underside line? Dad and mom are sheltering their children greater than we predict we’re — and it would take some actually deliberate actions on our half to ensure that our children are studying independence. And it would begin with letting them go discover milk within the grocery retailer when you’re within the produce part.
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